I keep finding myself planning one. I keep finding myself feeling hurt by the radio silence from people I have shared an office/workplace with for years, from family members. I don’t know what I want from anyone, really. But “social niceties” are just that: nice.
Then I look at Leonard and remember it does a body and soul good to just shake it off.
Folk har nok med sitt. Their own lives, their own problems. Just as I do right now. Part of my daily meditation really has been “compassion without expectation”.
I have never had cause to wonder about the truth in the saying: practice is preparation. But I have to admit that all the benefits of yoga/meditation habits I would have assumed I’d “earned” don’t seem to kicking in with any kind of physical memory automation. Instead I lay in bed yesterday, sleeping through nearly all of it, alternating paracetamol and Ibux for my headache.
Sometimes I think I am being ridiculously rational about everything. I want to give in to my inner 12 year-old right now. Just for an hour or two.
But yesterday’s headache wasn’t rational. I think it was a tantrum disguised as a respectable adult’s suffering.
So I’m going to shake it off. I’m going to put on a very tight jogging bra, two knee braces, headphones blaring my “happy music” playlist, and go for a friggin run where it smells like summer!
Finding My Bearings Now 
Great attitude! It’s important to take care of oneself and let go of things that are out of our control. Enjoy that summer run!
founder of balance thy life https://balancethylife.com
Ren, We’ve just found out a month ago, that my husband has aggressive prostrate cancer and the healthcare here in Florida is so slow. He finally had good news today though, that showed on the PET scan that it has not metastasized, and we expect a pretty good prognosis.
I know this sounds a lil odd, but we are quite a bit older than you (mid 60’s) and we feel that so many lovely people hasn’t had the opportunity to live as long as we have. I guess it’s our way of coping. If we were your age, it would … I would think it’d have been so much more harder to cope with. But at least we got to live a fairly long life. It looks as if my husband may get to go on even longer if all goes well.
I wish I could sit in a coffee shop with you and just listen to you … your concerns and your fears. And if needed a full blast pity party, just to listen. Even if you have a 12 year old girl need to let it all out. So glad you thought of a healthy way to cope today by running.
You are human and we were built with the idea of everlasting life in our very hearts. So you have every reason to grieve this difficult time. However, I have much hope and confidence in your full recovery as medicine has come so much further. xoxo
There’s not such a huge difference in our ages. I am 57. Last night I learned my best friend has now 2 to 6 weeks left. She is 51. She was diagnosed with glioblastoma just a few days after she turned 50. A month or so ago she was laughing about how 51 sounded so much better than 50. She was so glad she’d made it to 51. I am thinking – 79 sounds young. Too young I had a DVT at 51 and nearly died. It was touch and go for a week – even then – thinking wow, I did pack a lot of living into these years, didn’t I? I will try to hold that thought too with gratitude and with hope – for your husband, too! I know that prostate cancer is kind of brushed off as a – oh everyone gets it thing – but that it is not always and that it is damn scary regardless. So glad it hasn’t spread! Love to both of you. Thank you so much for your kindness!
Shake it off is good. My old acupuncturist said that physically shaking things off before going to bed is really good for your brain. I must admit I haven’t the discipline to do that. I think that’s why I miss competitive sport, because I used to shake things off by being an aggressive old sod. Probably not great either. And nothing wrong with pity parties, you know. Rx